Leading Out Loud by Terry Pearce & Randy Komisar
Author:Terry Pearce & Randy Komisar [Pearce, Terry & Komisar, Randy]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: John Wiley & Sons, Incorporated
Published: 2013-02-11T05:00:00+00:00
Acknowledging Resistance
Your expressions of authentic gratitude will help others recognize your humanity, but might do little to give them an experience of your empathy with their own points of view. Resistance and disagreement are natural responses to a call for change. Before making that call, you need to consider what people might be thinking and feeling about this issue. You need to consider what their natural mental and emotional resistance to this change might be, and be ready to acknowledge this resistance in advance. In very real terms, this is “empathy in advance”—it is a chance to consider others before you actually encounter them. As you know, people don’t like change, and at first mention, lacking context or further explanation, they will resist, even if they don’t show it.
In business lore of the 1950s, Alfred Sloan, head of General Motors, was purportedly in a board meeting, about to make an important decision. He said, “I take it that everyone is in basic agreement with this decision.” Everyone nodded. Sloan looked at the group and said, “Then I suggest we postpone the decision. Until we have some disagreement, we don’t understand the problem.”5 Of course he was right. Often, resistance will remain silent unless the leader is sensitive and smart enough to acknowledge it up front. When it is acknowledged, resistance can be a powerful building block for eventual agreement and engagement. As you build your Guide, considering other points of view and possible objections is important to your being able to think through the cogency of your own ideas. More important, it is central to being able to acknowledge others’ ideas and feelings as a way of building trust.
Of course, most of us fail to do this. We think through others’ arguments, but we define them only as hurdles that we have to knock down or leap over to get our own way, rather than the reasonable points of view of others we hope to lead into a relationship of trust. Jim Nunan, a friend, client, and long-time high-level HR executive, told me a story about one of his general managers who’d been the focus of a series of complaints from employees. While the complaints varied in intensity, the subject matter was always the same—the executive did not listen. Jim made an appointment to speak to the executive about the problem and arrived at the appointed time.
He began to spell out the problem, and noticed that as he spoke, the executive was making notes on the pad on his desk. “This is impressive,” mused Jim. “He’s writing down what I’m saying. It doesn’t look like a lack of listening to me.” Just then the executive was called from the room to take a phone call. Quickly, Jim looked at the notes. The GM had not been taking notes—he had been writing down his rebuttal.
Most of us are actively thinking about rebuttal, even if we are not making notes. If you are a change agent, your strong statements of purpose will
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